Black User Stories 😱
- AS A
- Firefox User
- I WANT
- my browser to allow copying from the password safe
- SO THAT
- I can paste the passwords into Word for printing them.
- AS A
- Firefox User
- I WANT
- Mozilla to disable all my addons
- SO THAT
- I can experience how the web looks without an adblocker.
- AS A
- Alexa User
- I WANT
- Amazon staff to listen to my recordings
- SO THAT
- they can laugh at my awful dialect.
- AS A
- a Facebook user
- I WANT
- Facebook to store my password in plaintext
- SO THAT
- the Facebook employees can laugh about my easy password.
- AS A
- newsletter user
- I WANT
- companies to check my e-mail using a verification service
- SO THAT
- my e-mail address is published in an open mongo db.
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link)
- AS A
- federal police authority
- I WANT
- to store bodycam recordings in the cloud
- SO THAT
- a minor misconfiguration can expose them to the whole world.
- AS A
- messenger user
- I WANT
- people to be able to find me using my phone number
- SO THAT
- my abusive ex knows when I am chatting.
- AS A
- sex toy owner
- I WANT
- my vibrator to connect to the cloud
- SO THAT
- I can accidentally share how often I masturbate.
- AS A
- Facebook user
- I WANT
- Facebook to suggest new friends based on my location
- SO THAT
- I get to know the other patients of my psychologist.
- AS A
- User
- I WANT
- the ToS to be 32 pages long
- SO THAT
- I have a good excuse why I did not read them anyway.
- AS A
- Netflix user
- I WANT
- the next episode to start automatically
- SO THAT
- I do not need to consider going to bed at 2am.
- AS A
- chinese user
- I WANT
- the government to filter the internet
- SO THAT
- I can easily avoid reading the wrong news.
- AS A
- devop
- I WANT
- to use a container built by a stranger
- SO THAT
- I have less work deploying it without noticing the bitcoin miner on the mail server.
- AS A
- news reader
- I WANT
- the website to use Facebook for comments
- SO THAT
- my friends can see what stupid things I post below the article.
- AS A
- search engine user
- I WANT
- to have personalized results
- SO THAT
- I do not need to leave my bubble.
- AS A
- PC-User
- I WANT
- to have a management engine in my CPU
- SO THAT
- I can compute while I compute.
- AS A
- gamer
- I WANT
- to have a game with lootboxes
- SO THAT
- I have a positive surprise, when every 100th contains something valuable.
- AS A
- Twitter user
- I WANT
- Twitter to keep my deleted messages
- SO THAT
- they still can leak in the next data breach.
- AS A
- browser user
- I WANT
- my browser to stop extensions from modifying websites
- SO THAT
- nobody can damage my user experience by removing all the interesting ads.
- AS A
- video platform
- WE WANT
- to show you many flat earth and anti vaccine videos
- SO THAT
- you keep being a stupid person, but click more ads than the educated persons.
- AS A
- company
- I WANT
- to take your privacy and security seriously
- SO THAT
- you won't be mad at us when you find all your data in a pastebin.
- AS AN
- EU citizen
- I WANT
- to have #article13
- SO THAT
- my schoolmate's stupid YouTube channel is closed.
- AS A
- public transport user
- I WANT
- the surveillance cameras to have microphones
- SO THAT
- at least the security guard is listening when I bore the people I am talking to in the subway.
- AS A
- PC user
- I WANT
- to be unable to turn off updates
- SO THAT
- my PC needs to install updates for half an hour when I have to do a important presentation.
- AS A
- developer
- I WANT
- my team chat to need 4 GB of RAM
- SO THAT
- I have a reason to get a new workstation.
- AS A
- smarthome owner
- I WANT
- my alarm system to have a microphone
- SO THAT
- the Google Assistant hears me screaming when somebody murders me.
- AS A
- Parody site
- I WANT
- to amuse you with black user stories
- SO THAT
- you can laugh about the sad reality.